Day 420 and 7 Days Left
The intense, heart pounding, palm sweating, stomach-butterflying type moments of our lives.
You know the moment, right? You've been waiting for it for a while. You've been rehearsing what to say and how to say it. You want everything to go just right. You even have trouble sleeping the night before.
Like a field goal kicker coming in with two seconds left to kick for the win. Like a king giving a speech to his army right before they go into an uncertain battle. Like the moment you are going to let your affections be known to the girl of your dreams. It is the intense, heart pounding, palm sweating, stomach-butterflying type moments of our lives. You will either ride off into the sunset or crash and burn. Sometimes you triumph and sometimes you lay an egg. A stinky, off-colored, misshapen egg. And everyone can see it.
Well, last night was my moment. It was my last meeting with our Dangriga leaders after being with them for a year. It was my moment. I had the right message. I had earned the right to speak it to the dear friends and partners the Lord had brought into my life here in Belize. It was my last time to share with them from God's word. I was fired up. I was pumped, and I gave it my all.
There is only one problem.
My intensity, my passion, and my desire to see them do well was not received by some. They thought I was telling them they were not good enough and that I was frustrated with them. My plan was to do the exact opposite. My objective was to build them up and to give them hope. I wanted them to see how beautiful they are and how thankful I am to each and everyone of them for all the time, energy, and love they have given to me. Instead, some were built up and others were hurt and confused. I remember when Moses and Joshua gave their farewell addresses to the people, it came off rather similar. They were setting before the people the road to blessing and warning them of the potential for cursing. Some probably thought Moses was old and losing it and Joshua was just a jerk.
After processing a bit, I feel like God gave me the right message, but I could have done a better job of delivering it. Being right is not enough. True righteousness is much deeper than that. It is doing the right thing, in the right way, at the right time, with the right heart. That is what my Jesus does every time.
I am glad that today is a new day. I am glad that I get to try and make amends. I am glad that Jesus forgives and teaches me. I am glad that I am now more aware of how delicate those special, precious few moments that come my way.
This photo is of our men's retreat and it was INCREDIBLE. Thank you Jesus.